It’s that time of life, ladies—wedding season. Our kids are getting hitched, our friends’ kids are tying the knot, and even grandkids and nephews are making their way down the aisle. Having just had my own kids married off in the past two years, and after attending a few too many weddings, I’m left shaking my head. Why is it that the closer your relationship to the family, the more diva-like you become? Want to avoid being the guest everyone whispers about? Buckle up, buttercup, because this might sting.

It’s Not Your Day

Weddings are about the couple, not you. Planning one is an expensive, emotionally charged process, forcing couples and parents to make difficult compromises. Parents often don’t have the final say, and your bestie—the mother of the bride or groom—likely doesn’t control the guest list, seating chart, or who’s invited to special events. So don’t corner her at the wedding and demand to know why you’re at the “overflow table.” Their decisions rule. Take a deep breath and sit down.

Last-Minute Invite?

Got a “B-list” invite? Don’t take it personally. Weddings are full of logistical headaches and strict guest limits; even close friends and family might not make the first cut. If you’re invited late, either graciously accept or politely decline—but don’t make a fuss. Remember, being included at all is still an honor. If you decide to go, do it with class.

RSVP Like It’s Your Job

RSVPs: why do so many of us mess this up? Even if you’re family, the first thing you can do as a guest is RSVP on time and as requested. If there’s a card, fill it out and mail it. Don’t let it sit on the kitchen counter or disappear in the junk drawer. If it’s online, follow the instructions. Don’t assume you’re special enough to call or text your response. When you ignore the RSVP deadline, you force the bride, groom, or—worse—the mother of the bride to chase you down. Don’t be that person.

No Plus-One, No Kids, No Negotiations

If your invite says “adults only” or no plus-one, respect that. Don’t assume your partner or bestie can tag along, and don’t show up with someone uninvited. Couples set boundaries for a reason, usually tied to budget or wanting an intimate vibe. Stick to who’s on the invite—anything else is just rude.

Destination Weddings: Be Prepared

Destination weddings? Fun, but they come with rules. Book your hotel on time and read the wedding website or info card for logistics. Don’t ask the bride’s mom basic questions she doesn’t have time to answer. And if costs are too steep, no one’s forcing you to go. Weddings are pricey for everyone involved, so don’t add to the stress by griping.

Use The Registry

Gift-giving can be a landmine, so let’s clear it up: if there’s a registry, use it. Don’t go rogue and buy something not listed, especially if the couple already has a furnished home. If there is no registry, money is often preferred. It’s not tacky—it’s practical. And don’t show up with a boxed gift at a destination wedding. No one wants to lug your 12-piece glassware set back home. Ship it ahead, or go with a card and check. Simple and appreciated.

Dress Codes Aren’t Suggestions

Dress codes exist for a reason. If the bride requests Coastal Chic or Black Tie, follow it. If you don’t know what that means, Google it or check Pinterest. Allow the bride to realize her vision. Remember, you’re there to celebrate, not upstage anyone. And if you’re unsure about that sequined gown you bought on sale, ask someone in the know.

Say Cheese and Smile

The best way to be a good friend and a memorable guest is to show up with a great attitude. Compliment the couple, congratulate the parents, and bring your best dance moves. Keep your phone tucked away during the ceremony and save the complaints for later. Weddings are stressful enough—don’t be the one adding drama. Keep the spotlight on the happy couple and take part in making beautiful memories.

Is Being a Diva Your Go-To Move?

Would you go with the flow or make a fuss if you were seated at the “wrong” table?

Yay or Nay on wedding dress codes?